as many of my silent observers have noted, i had decided to stop posting for awhile. to be honest, i have felt that what i had to say or contribute in regard to the Femdom relationship i have been involved in was not valued or appreciated. i am one of many submissive male voices out there trying to be heard above the prattle of those who seek only to fulfill themselves and pretend to live a Femdom based lifestyle based on satiating physical or sexual appetites and not seeing the true value or realizing the submissive chi given and returned in serving a Mistress completely.
serving a dominant Woman is much more than that! first and foremost, a Mistress is a human being with needs, desires, and sometimes complex issues which can get tangled up in the day to day, vanilla to vanilla and dark to dark. i am learning that sometimes it is important to give Her space and not smother Her every want and need. my Mistress is in many respects quite capable and supremely independent in the life that She chooses to live. but, She also relies on me for the day to day, mundane tasks which can overwhelm, shackle Her creative processes and weigh Her down. it is my purpose and delight to be needed in this respect.
i must be honest, that W/we do have O/our occasional disagreements which may bubble-up between U/s now and then. it does require stepping back sometimes and communicating respectfully with O/one A/another. but i do love being able to spend time, and being a servant and pet to Her. besides being my Mistress, She has also become a very dear and close friend who seems to know me better than anyone else. She calls me on my bullshit and once in awhile, enjoys devising ways to torment and abuse me for Her own amusement and pleasure.
... so, after some personal reflection, and coaxing mixed with a dash of painful arm twisting,*ouch!* i have decided to continue this blog. if not for the silent others, at least it will be a place for me to continue to record my deepest, personal thoughts and perspectives while on this Femdom journey. a safe portal in a sense to resume the discovery of my true self and absorb that which She feels will complete me and ultimately empower and benefit Her.
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