i was still incredibly groggy when my Mistress and Her entourage arrived early Friday morning to exchange vehicles. afterall, it was 4:00AM in the morning. i had barely slept two hours, when i heard Her characteristic loud knocking on the door with my antique door knocker.
i half stumbled down the steps to let Her in, and there She stood, bright eyed, energetic and bouncing, full of life. i surmised that She must of drank a gallon of coffee to be so bouncy this early in the morning. She would of had to survive the 10 hour drive.
"Hello! Good morning! Did you expect U/us at this time?" i tried to see through the glaze of sleep which permeated over my eyes, but i was not too successful.
"Here, take my coat. I want something to eat. W/we have brought blueberry moonshine. Here take a sip." She poured me out a shot and watched me with playful, yet discerning eyes. the liquor burned down my throat but was indeed quite tasty..
"Ha Ha! Now you are really going to fall asleep. It's 100 proof!." She pointed to the label with a slender articulated finger. Oh oh, now i really was in trouble.
i stayed up for another half and hour or so and forced myself to socialize, as i always enjoy seeing my Mistress. it does not matter at what hour or time She decides to pop in on me and usher a hasty visit.
sometimes though, i don't know. i think She almost has the ability to read my mind. either that, or W/we have been together so long that W/we seem to anticipate each other's needs pretty well. anyway, i felt terrible about not being permitted to serve, while here at Her western lair. there were just too many vanilla people about, and i wanted to respect Her wishes in regard to protocol. but, i just felt kind of robbed and let down that i couldn't and wasn't expected to jump up and serve Her.
i don't know how to explain it, but it is like this desperate longing that builds and builds and has to be recognized and released. not releasing it interferes with my ability to focus and get things done in my normal life. i become obsessed with wanting to please Her and i know that everything has it's time and place, but this urge to serve sometimes is so strong that it just bulldozes through every other normal desire in my life. i am not sure if my Mistress experiences the same feelings in regard to having me serve Her, but i would like to think so.
for the most part, i think my Mistress has trained me so well, that serving Her needs, wants and wishes is paramount to my inner wiring or innate connections. but, shouldn't that be the way it is with any well trained, obedient submissive and his Mistress? Shouldn't Her thoughts become his thoughts, and Her mind's focus also meld into his? isn't that the ultimate goal of a bdsm relationship? isn't the focus and goal of power exchnge to be so ingrained not only in the physical sense, but through the intents of the heart and mind as well? therfore, it is a paradox for me to switch on and off in this regard. yet, somehow i have been able to do it.
but, enough of me ranting.
i told Y/you that a good Mistress knows innately the thoughts and feelings of Her male submissive. my Mistress possesses an innate and intuitive sense in terms of my needs. sometimes She can meet them quickly with a cold hard look that lets me know my place beneath Her feet. other times it is a command or order that She levies at me through an email or text which subsequently melts me into a lump of submissive foot goo. of course using unflattering pet names to describe me such as wimp, wuss, dork, whipped, etc ... also reinforces who i am and my place.
but, it was getting late, and much as i had enjoyed visiting and socializing with Her, it was time for me to exit, dress and get ready for a long day of work.
my Mistress noticed my apprehension and directly picked up on it.
"Why do you keep looking at the clock, don't you know that is incredibly rude to do that while I'm here?"
i looked down sheepishly and stumbled and stammered trying to find the right words.
" yes, i know, but i really need to think about leaving and getting ready for work." i spoke directly and quietly.
She grabbed another liquor infused blueberry, popped it in Her mouth, sucked it for awhile then swallowed. Her eyes then narrowed and a half paused smirk snuck across Her lips.
"Oh, really? ... and what time might that be?"
She arched back in Her chair then kicked off Her blue flats. this was a very strong signal to me, that She intended to stay for awhile and that i better have a very good reason for preparing to leave.
"well, i said quietly, i need to be to work by 7:15. i really need to go upstairs, and change. besides, it is "casual Friday, and i'll be back quickly. it shouldn't take me very long."
She looked at me like a cat that was preparing to pounce on a mouse, and i could see that Her mind was whizzing and whirring and that She was going to use this as an opportunity to poke fun and play with me.
" I really don't think that you need to change at all. Wear what you have on. You look just fine."
She knew the way that She said it was very close to a direct command and in my submissive state, She could very well tell me to go to work naked and i would probably do it. but, due to the early hour, i was kinda of groggy and just a tad grumpy and i questioned Her.
" i can't wear this to work. it's my sleepwear. i'd look sill ... then i realized ... She had me. y in this."
i watched helplessly as Her green eyes sparkled and widened with delight. Her smirk widened to a wicked toothy grin and i watched helplessly as Her upper fangs brushed up against the bottom lip then swept by Her darting tongue.
"Exactly, and you will do as I say. Right?"
i was trapped now, and She knew it. i was honor and duty bound to do what She ordered and my choices for a quick and honorable exit were dwindling rapidly.
"yes, i .... will" i hesitated briefly, but regained myself when i saw the features on Her face harden.
"Good. and you do want to please me, Right? So here is what I want you to wear today."
She propped Her muscular calf balanced over Her knee and began pumping then curling and flicking Her long toes at me. it was as if She was driving proverbial nails into my coffin.
"you will wear what you have on, for it pleases Me ... No strike that, I have changed my mind. I want you to dress in those white sweatpants and shirt and wear a hoodie with big rabbit ears and ridiculously big rabbit feet. And I'll find you a little puffy tail to wear." Understood? She threw back her dark mane of hair and gazed at me with direct intention
i knew whenever my Mistress said, "Understood", that this was of utmost importance to Her and that I had better do it and follow through with Her wishes.
"yes, i do understand, but i really don't have a bunny suit, and where will I find one at this hour of the morning?"
She didn't miss a beat, and quickly replied,
"That's your problem boy. Do it." She responded more gruffly and with greater assertiveness that said, i had better get going.
"Oh, and one more thing, She grabbed me brusquely by the front of my shirt and pulled me down close. pinching my nose hard between her strong long fingers i found it difficult to breathe and opened my mouth to create a clearer airway.
"Now, listen to this, little boy." She whispered breathlessly into my ear.
" I am going to have the septum of your nose pierced also, and you will be led around as My little bunny boy, hopping around serving, entertaining and amusing Me like the little bitch that you and I both know you are and were always intended to be."
She pinched my nose even harder once more until my eyes reddened and teared, then released me with a swift kick to the ass and sent me scurrying upstairs to Her ridicule and tethered laughter.
"Now, hop to it!"
i did obediently as i was told and hopped obsequiously up the stairs.
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